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[Huaisang knows that anxiety as well as he knows his own so without hesitation, he leans over and gives Shi Qingxuan's lips a gentle, chaste kiss. He lingers there for several long moments before pulling back to continue speaking softly.]

I intend to. My brother was leader before me and he is new to this world. The Unclean Realm was his home, too, and familiarity might help him better adjust to living here. On the other hand, living here hurts me now. My brother's murder... It happened here. This is where it all happened in our world.

[He blinks back a sudden fresh wave of tears.]

I could handle it before they came. I'd handled it for ten years. But all of us being here again... All of us in these walls, trying to keep the peace... Trying to give the killer a second chance to redeem himself... Knowing that he's in bed with my brother again acting like none of it ever happened and we can all just move on so easily.

[The old familiar anger and bitterness starts creeping back in, the hatred that robbed him of reason and conscience until all that mattered to him was Jin Guangyao's total destruction, no matter the price he had to pay. But Huaisang still has enough self-control to catch himself before his thoughts slip down that dark and twisted passage again. He takes a deep breath, the fatigue showing on his face again.]

....I can't do it, Shi-xiong. I won't do it. Not again. What has he done to deserve the amount of mercy and compassion he demands from me after ruining so many lives? My life? My brother's life? The lives of the women he murdered or locked up to conceal his crime? Why should he get his happiness when I'm always forced to sacrifice mine? It's not fair. It's not right.

[And he's starting to get worked up again. More steadying breaths.]

.I don't know if the Augur will grant my wish. Or if it'll be like this. But I... I was hoping you'd come with me, Shi-xiong. I don't do well living alone. And I don't want to be where you aren't. This... This place isn't home to me anymore. You are.