illicitly | Open RP Post

Nie Huaisang was beautiful.

Every single thing about him was beautiful. It was all he could think about as the haze of pleasure began to fade and the press of his love's forehead was against him. His breath evened out slowly and he moved his hips a bit so he could pull out of him.

Jin Ziyao lay still as he was wiped up with care and smiled softly as he watched him, wrapping his arms around him and cuddling close when he came back in.

"I want to marry you. I have some of the gifts I was going to give you. Let us marry for ourselves, somewhere beautiful, and then have a big wedding for the public. I can't wait anymore. I know we said we were going to take it slowly, but all I want to do is bow with you in front of the gods." His eyes were wet and his voice hoarse.

"After everything, everywhere I have run to and run from...
You are my home, Nie Huaisang.

You. My kind sweet gentle scholar. My beautiful ruthless cunning leader. Everything about you feels like home. Please take me as your husband. I want to spend every day and night with you.

I was serious about bearing your children."

Of course, Huaisang fears what his ancestors would think. To wed a man who had murdered one of their own, even to protect him from his brother's wrath is a complicated matter. He wants this, however. A partner, a family. Being able to continue his clan's line. No one would approve of such a match for him but he wants this life, this man he's loved since he was a confused boy only just starting to learn what love and loyalty meant.

"I'll announce I'm going on a trip to the elders tomorrow. It'll give us a chance to pick up a few things for the ceremony. I know a place we can go to wed undisturbed. There's an old hunter's cabin in the woods I visit when I need to get away."

He's going through with this, he's decided, regardless of his anxiety. He's been an outlier all his life, frequently alone and feeling out of place within his own sect and family. But just as Huaisang is his lover's home, his lover is also his home now.

"The wedding robes might be a little less ornate but sketches of our parents and other things can be used. We can drape the cabin in red and make our wedding bed beautiful for us."

"That sounds lovely. I need to go and get my things from the inn as well. Make me a list and I can work on collecting things in town. I do not mind our robes being less ornate. I would bow in bloody rags as long as I am with you.

We need to find the next auspicious day for us to marry."

It was complicated. Thier families were intertwined in blood and hatred and love. They were bound in the same way. He closed his eyes as his love laid out a plan. He lived his life trying to do what his mother wanted for him. To please his father to marry well and be a great nobleman.

He wanted this for himself. He took a deep breath and turned to him.

"A-Sang...I need to find Mama's bones. I can paint her from memory, but I have to place her to rest before I can bow to her." He hadn't asked the diety to bring here there, because of the sexual nature of that land.

When he first met Huaisang on the island he had said he had her whole and somewhere safe.

"I would have liked her to meet you. I know she would have loved you A-Sang."

"She's safe. I buried her at my cabin so animals wouldn't ravage her. She's there, waiting for you."

A flicker of guilt crosses his expression. In his rage, he'd thought to desecrate her as his brother had been but in the end, he hadn't been able to go through with it. Still, that he'd even considered such a brutal act toward an innocent woman would love him.

"She's safe," he repeats softly. "You'll be able to bow to her."

He doesn't ask about Jin Guangshan.

"I'll make a list before we part tomorrow and look into a date."

He lets out a soft sob he didn't know he was holding him. Into his lover's shoulders, just allowing him to feel the emotions he had held in for so long. In some ways he never got to grieve her and others he grieved her every single day.

"Thank you. Thank you A-Sang," he whispered softly, before wiping his tears with a hand.

He would have rather bowed to his elder brother. Jin Zixuan who had held him wanted him than the father who didn't. He was a bit sad to leave him behind on the island, among the many others they loved. He was grateful for the time he had with them.

"Okay.

That sounds lovely. I'll get everything we would need for a wedding. Should I get your favorite foods and wine? How well-stocked is the cabin? It will probably need cleaning as well."

Huaisang catches his lover's hand in his own and brushes a kiss across the knuckles.

"If you want to, love. I'll see to it that we're well-stocked with Yunmeng spices upon our return. The cabin has enough food to last us for a time but I fear that nothing there is suitable for a wedding feast."

He tries to remember when he'd last thought to stock the place. It was so long ago, even before he'd been whisked away to the island.

"Perhaps we should stop by the market along the way and pick up some things before we go."

Another soft kiss to the back of his hand.

"There are blankets and cloth and paints, however. Supplies for capturing wild birds, at least."

"Okay, that sounds like a good idea. I'll get what I can ready from the markets after a bath, we can meet in front of the large inn at the edge of town. I'll be in a different form, but we can read one another's thoughts.

I'll grab some supplies to hunt and fish as well. We will make a wonderful feast. I haven't felt this excited in so long my love. I cannot wait to show you my gifts for you." he leaned forward to kiss him once deeply, smiling.

He stood up then and stretched his legs out. His back was sore but he felt content. He walked over to Huaisang's table to retrieve a small knife, cutting off a bit of long brown hair. He quickly braided the strands together and walked back.

He kneeled in front of him and tied the small braid of hair to his wrist.

"This way you won't have to worry that this was a dream. You will know that I am here with you my love." His eyes shone as he regarded him before standing up and shapeshifting into a bird.

His lover knows him so well. How can anyone understand what Huaisang needs so perfectly? But it's always been like that between them, hasn't it? The other man understanding thoughts and feelings that Huaisang himself struggles to understand much less voice out loud. His best friend, the love of his life, soon to be his spouse as long as they live.

The room feels cold and empty again as soon as he's gone and Huaisang immediately touches the braid on his wrist to reassure himself. This is real. All of this is real. Jin Ziyao is in love wih him and wants to be with him, even after everything. He's alive and they're going to be wed. It's not an act or a betrayal.

It takes him some time to get ready: sketches of his parents, a pair of fine goblets, a bottle of his best wine, plenty of oil, gold jewelry and enough money to purchase an adequate amount of red fabric to adorning the matrimonial bed along with food. Once he stuffs it all into a qiankun bag, he heads out to inform the elders that he'll be away on a personal matter for a week or two. While they're not particularly happy to see him take another trip so soon, they're accustomed enough to his absences to not put up too much of a fuss.

After his arrangements are made, Huaisang heads out to the agreed meeting place, dressed down for travel, and waits in front of the inn for his lover to appear.

Ziyao flew into his room without anyone else noticing his absence. The first thing he did was transform back into his borrowed form and request a bath.

He had time to think about things in the tub. Nie Huaisang was with him and wanted to marry him. His mother was safe and he can bow before her with the man he truly loved. His heart fluttered in his chest. Thier love-making was always so intense. But it felt like he had come home in a way he had never felt before. He knew he wanted this.

He never wanted something so badly before and if he had to live his whole life in a feminine form to be with him he was willing.

After his bath, he took out any jewelry he had from the island that was not a betrothal gift so he could sell for supplies. There were a few places he had hidden money in his former life that should be undisturbed he can reach later if he needed.

For now, he grabbed a bit f breakfast gathered his belongings, and went about the market to attain supplies for a wedding. After all of his tasks were done he came back to the inn, walking up to his lover and squeezing his hands.

"Are you ready? I can get a carriage ready. I bought the supplies we needed." the carriage would afford them a bit of privacy at least and he dared not mount Hensheng here.

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